


You’ve got a message!

by AloisLeTrancy



Category: South Park
Genre: Blowjobs, Bottom Eric Cartman, Bullying, Child Abandonment, Depression, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff, Gay, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Kyman - Freeform, M/M, OOC, PTSD, Racism, Secrets, Sex, Suicidal Thoughts, Top Kyle Broflovski, handjobs, what you don’t know cant kill you
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:14:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 17,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24196516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AloisLeTrancy/pseuds/AloisLeTrancy
Summary: It’s the boys’ final year of high school and everything that has changed is still the same. But with a new app making its rounds around the small town of South Park, Stan becomes suspicious, Kyle feels confident in finding something out, Eric is pushed to the edge, and Kenny-well, Kenny’s just having a good time, just happy to be alive.
Relationships: Kyle Broflovski/Eric Cartman, Stan Marsh/Wendy Testaburger
Comments: 22
Kudos: 104





	1. Swipe Right

‘’Dude, what the fuck?!’’ Kyle Broflovski stood at the entrance of an all too familiar alleyway. Feet glued into the snow that continued to pile around him and chill him to the bone. Except it wasn’t the cold icy flakes that sent shivers down his spine and made his stomach drop to his feet. It was what was in front of him n the alley that made his skin crawl, made him feel sick and terrified all at once.

And then there was just red seething anger and the all too familiar feeling of heat rising from his chest to his face and his blood boiled. His fists curled and uncurled as he dug his nails hard into his palms. He was ready to kill. And he just might.

3 months earlier

‘’Nah fuck that, that’s just stupid.’’ Kyle gave a scrunched up look of disinterest to Stan who sat beside him. Stan rolled his eyes in return and then gestured to Kenny, ‘’Can you please tell him how awesome this is!’’ Kenny looked at Kyle and gestured his hands wildly, ‘’Ok dude so look,’’ he pulled his ancient looking phone out and swiped his way to the app they were all talking about, ‘’See look, it’s amazing dude-all these strangers, and they all just want to fuck! I’ve had like four different blowjobs the past week!’’ 

Kyle looked at him in disgust, ‘’You’re gonna catch something dude. You know that right?’’ 

Kenny just shrugged his shoulders indifferent to the comment, ‘’It’s so fucking awesome dude,’’ Stan cut back into the conversation quickly, ‘’Please dude! It’s not like you have to meet up with anyone-I just wanna know if she’s on there dude!’’ Kyle looked at him in annoyance ‘’And why the hell cant you just download this stupid thing onto your phone?’’ His best friend scoffed at that, ‘’Kyle, you know I can’t! Wendy checks my phone on the daily. We have an open phone policy, no secrets!’’ ‘’Then why the hell am I doing this to begin with if you can just check her phone yourself?!’’ He was agitated at this point, Stan had been bugging him all morning and during their first class together and at their break about this stupid app. He would not shut up about it ever since he found out it was a thing. He just kept insisting he download it for him. ‘’She’d be too smart to put it on her phone Kyle, what if she’s using one of her friends phone?? Dude I just,’’ he looked at Kyle pleading ‘’She’s been acting so weird the past couple of days dude. I just wanna know. I have to know. Please just download it for me and check. Please? You don’t have to meet up with anyone!’’ 

The ginger absentmindedly rolled his eyes and gave a loud sigh, defeated. ‘’Fine.’’ 

At that moment Eric Cartman came trudging through the cafeteria doors, all scowl and malice. He sat down next to Kenny who gave him a confused look, ‘’What’s wrong with you, dude?’’ Eric’s eyes almost immediately snapped to the blonde boy’s face beside him, causing the other to flinch slightly at the sharp gesture, ‘’None of your business Kenny, just those assholes again. Stupid motherfuckers think they can just do as they please, but they’ll see, they’ll get what’s coming to them soon enough.’’ He said darkly, smirking to himself and thinking aloud to himself more than to those around him about what convoluted wicked scheme he had in mind. 

Kyle gave Stan a look and the other shook his head. Eric hadn’t been the incredibly malicious, racist, world-destroying sociopath he was a couple years ago. In fact ever since that summer between middle school into high school Eric had changed a lot. No one knew what happened but it was like everything he had done had actually caught up with him, like he suddenly had morals and understood why everything he kept doing to the people around him was so messed up. After that he didn’t have as much fight in him as he did before. He had met up with Stan, Kyle and Kenny like he usually had for the bus the first day of Freshman year and they couldn’t believe their eyes. He had lost weight, although he still was chubby in some areas, you could tell he was pretty fit and he kept his hair slicked back, discarding his signature hat, giving more focus to his hazel eyes and incredible long lashes. He also swapped his usual attire for a pair of tight skinny jeans and a red sweatshirt that came incredibly close to how his old button up looked. But nicer. The only person to comment in that moment was Kenny who uttered out a ‘’Holy shit dude.’’ They all stood there staring at him in disbelief, Eric Theodore Cartman had become hot. None of the girls flirted with him still though, everyone still wondering when this facade would end. When would the other shoe drop? Wondering what kind of evil scheme the little bastard was coming up with next. But it never did. And before everyone knew it, they were in senior year. 

Over the course of their four years all the boys seemed to suddenly sprout like long weeds. Kyle growing a staggering 5 inches in the process putting him at 5’11 with Stan and Kenny also gaining a couple inches, both of them hovering around 6’ but surprisingly, Eric stayed around 5’6. A midget in the midst of the giants he hung around. And his evil schemes weren’t the same. He’d pulled a couple of stupid pranks here and there and would curse and insult people under his breath on the daily, but there wasn’t as much animosity behind it all anymore. 

Slowly, everyone adjusted to it. 

Everyone except Kyle. Even though he no longer hurled insults like ‘’Jew-boy’’ and ‘’stupid fucking Jew’’ at him anymore, it just wasn’t rational to believe that the Eric fucking Cartman, he knew from elementary school and middle school, the guy who wore Hitler outfits, acting as a dictator, who abused and used any opportunity he had to make his life living hell, the guy who fucking fed Scot’s parents to him in a bowl of chili over less than twenty bucks-that fucking guy, had suddenly just changed overnight. No. There was no way.

He gave Stan a look indicating an ‘I told you so.’ Trying to rub it in his face that Cartman hadn’t changed, and those words were the proof of it, but Stan rolled his eyes and just shook his head in turn. ‘’What did they do to you this time Eric?’’ Stan suddenly focused his attention to the brunette who seemed to be fuming in his seat, ‘’They tried cornering me in the bathroom again. I don’t know what the fuck they want from me, they’re a bunch of fuckings fags tho. Always after my sweet ass that they can’t fucking have, ‘’ he mocked wiggled his body in an enticing gesture, and then grunted in disgust as his hand wiped over his neck during the movement, ‘’one of them tried to give me a fucking hickey! The asshole kept licking my neck and trying to bite down.’’ He looked at his hand and viscously rubbed it against his jeans. 

Hearing that made Kyle’s hands twitch slightly. Ever since Eric had lost the weight and became more attractive, a lot of the other guys from their other classes had started to bully and harass him. It didn’t seem like their last year of high school was going to be any different. It made him angry at the thought, he looked at Eric with sympathy in his eyes. He may not have believed he had really changed but he still didn’t want the fatass to get hurt by a bunch of assholes with nothing else to do. He straightened up in his chair when he realized everyone at their table was staring at him, ‘’Wh-what?’’ He stammered out, suddenly embarrassed and confused by the shift of attention. His best friend next to him raised an eyebrow, ‘’You’re going to do it. Right Kyle?’’ Cartman took his phone out suddenly, ‘’It’s this app isn’t it?’’ He showed the redhead his phone. Kyle shook his head and gave another big sigh, his second one in the past 5 minutes, ‘’Oh for fucks sake-yes yes, I’ll download the stupid app for you.’’ ‘’Thanks man!’’ Stan slapped his back, clearly incredibly happy and relieved that whatever was going on with Wendy was soon going to pass once he received whatever information he needed to from Kyle. 

The redhead’s eyes shifted to Eric’s phone, seeing him in the process of downloading the app himself.

‘Huh.’ He thought. ‘That’s interesting.’ 

And just like that, a plan had hatched itself into Kyle Broflovski’s head, his annoyance over downloading the app himself swiftly being replaced with a sinister mood and a devious smile crossed his face for a split second. 

He would prove that Eric was still the same bastard he had always been. And he’d do it, anonymously.

When Kyle got home from school that day he was greeted immediately by the shrill voice of his mom, ‘’Welcome home Bubbulah!’’ He internally groaned at the nickname that would never go away, even now at 18 years old. ‘’Hi mom, I’m going to go do my homework in my room. I’ll come back down in a bit.’’ He called back as he made his way upto his room. He was too damn excited to start his plan than he’d really cared to admit. He’d even been thinking about it in length for his last classes after lunch. 

He sat on his bed and fiddled with his phone opening up the app ‘Sensual Strangers’, he used the spare email address Stan told him to use and thought up a quick password he’d be able to remember pretty quickly. When it came to setting up his profile he thought of what to call himself and what pictures to use. He wanted to remain as anonymous as possible so he picked a picture of some stupid meme from his phone and used that for the main photo and then laid back in his bed thinking about what kind of name he could drum up that wouldn’t sound too dumb. He hovered his fingers over the keyboard and began to type, ‘’Mister . . . Ruby . . . Jade. . .’’ He looked at the name all put together in one place and nodded to himself before filling out the rest of the profile and hitting submit. It would have to do.

Immediately there was a picture of some lady with her considerably large breasts nearly popping out of her shirt as she made some kind of kissing face while holding a drink. He swiped left. The next lady was almost the same thing and he swiped again. He continued to swipe left for fifteen minutes and started to contemplate whether or not he should even bother looking for him or if he should just give up and narrow his search so he could maybe see if Wendy was on there. Mid-thought, he paused his rapid swiping, finally he lifted his finger from his screen quickly, stopping himself from the almost automatic action. There he was. Eric Cartman. He looked at the photo he took as his main photo and admired how soft he looked. His eyes big and bright as the sun beamed down on his face, it was an outside picture, and his skin just looked so lovely in that light-wait what? What the hell? Kyle smacked at his face and shook his head back and forth, ‘’God. Where the hell did that thought come from?’’ He looked back at his phone and hovering his finger above the screen, swiped right.  
~~~~~~  
Eric Cartman sat on the couch in his living room when his phone dinged, ‘You’ve got a message!’ He glanced at his phone on the coffee table, it was the app they were all talking about during lunch. He didn’t really think much of it when he downloaded it but now he was kind of excited that someone had actually swiped on his profile.

Opening up the phone he looked at the person’s profile who messaged him. A picture of a pretty lame meme greeted his sight and he chuckled lightly at how stupid it was. ‘’Mister Ruby. . . Never heard of him.’’ 

He read over the message that was sent to him

Mister Ruby Jade: Hey there beautiful. You’ve got lovely eyes

Eric felt his cheeks burn at the compliment, blushing slightly. He typed a reply

Eric C.: Your taste in humor is laaaaame. But thanks for the compliment I guess

He waited in anticipation for a reply and received one right away 

Mister Ruby Jade: Well, I thought it was pretty funny. Why is someone as beautiful as you on this kind of app anyway?

The brunette smiled in amusement as he typed out his reply

Eric C.: What’s it to you? Why are you on here?

Eric sprawled out on the couch more comfortable as their conversation continued. 

It felt like forever before he looked up from his phone, starting to feel a little peckish. And then he was suddenly incredibly aware at how long he’d been messaging this guy, they’d already been messaging each other back and forth for two and a half hours. The only real thing he’d learned about this Mr. Ruby guy was that he lived in the same town as he did. Other than that he’d mostly been asking Cartman all the questions. Cartman sat up from the couch and wandered into the kitchen, typing as he went 

Eric C.: Hey you wanna meet up tonight? Nothing serious or anything like that. Just a casual hang  
~~~~~~  
Kyle started at his phone in panic, he didn’t expect Eric to want to meet up, especially so soon. He literally just started to speak to him, he didn’t even know anything about him! Kyle felt his face grow hot. He was mad. He didn’t understand why but deep down it pissed him off that Cartman would so easily be willing to meet up with strangers that showed interest in him. It just wasn’t right.

As upset as he might’ve felt however, he started to type 

Mister Ruby Jade: Sure. We can meet in the back of the IHOP where no one usually sits. I’m not a fan of crowded areas, plus, I don’t think you’ll want to really be seen with me in public 

He furrowed his brows cursing to himself as he wondered how he’d be able to hide who he was from the brunette. 

He went to look in his closet for something to cover his face and body with. Upon going through everything he gave a loud sigh when he absolutely couldn’t find anything that would help keep him anonymous. His mom then yelled from downstairs, ‘’Are you getting all your work done up there?’’ ‘’Yes mom, I’m almost done!’’ He called back down. A thought crossed his mind just then as he walked out of his room and into his parent’s bedroom, immediately going to their closet where he pulled open an old box. It was from his moms younger days and he lifted out a red sequined leotard and tights and the red cat mask that went with it. He’d leave the pinned sparkly cat tail and heels behind. He had a feeling he probably wouldn’t need them. He closed the box and stuffed it back into their closet, feeling a sense of guilt and maybe a little shame as he clutched the clothing he was going to wear in order to protect himself from being found out. 

After standing in the bathroom looking himself up and down for a couple of minutes, the redhead checked again and again that no hair was seen, no freckles or any other distinguishing feature stuck out from under his disguise. He looked utterly ridiculous, but he wasn’t going to let Eric know who he was until he’d gotten the other to admit he was still the evil bastard he knew he was. Not to mention, having Eric be seen with someone dressed up in a sparkly cat outfight would be fucking hilarious revenge he’d love to revel in for the future. If only to use against Cartman whenever he got annoying. 

He checked his phone one more time as he slipped on a pair of pink bunny slippers his mom used to wear and told Eric he was coming.

It was dark out and he called to his mom that he’d be out for a little bit but would be back around 11, he heard her shouts of worry and indecisiveness on his leaving but understood he was an adult now and shouldn’t stop him even if she really wanted to. 

As Kyle speed-walked in the dark he wondered how this interaction would go. He wondered if Cartman would dress up too. He did say casual, but Eric had never been known for being a ‘’casual’’ kind of guy. 

His train of thought stopped when he looked up and noticed that he’d made it to the IHop. His gaze took in the moderate sized restaurant and he checked his phone one more time, seeing a notification of ‘You’ve got a message!’ From the app, he opened it up and read Eric’s message of already being in the back and already ordering food and drinks. He chuckled to himself. Of course he already ordered drinks and food. He was Cartman after all. Even if he was playing a stranger, it didn’t matter whether or not Cartman knew what food or beverage he preferred, the waiter had already come by so why bother waiting around and asking? No, that wasn’t the brunettes thing. First come, first serve. He got the upper hand on what they’d be eating.

His heart beat incredibly fast in his chest as he rounded the corner of the back of the IHop, he didn’t understand why he was suddenly so nervous about seeing him. Maybe it was the fact that he looked like some superhero cat from a comic book. He looked down at the sequins and scrunched his mouth up slightly, yeah, yeah that had to be it. It was just embarrassment is all. Even if Cartman didn’t know. 

His green eyes shifted back up upon noticing a lone broad figure sitting in a chair at a table meant for two, sipping on what no doubt in his mind was a glass of chocolate milk. He cleared his throat and spoke as low and dark as he could, trying to keep his voice from sounding like himself. 

‘’Uh, hi beautiful.’’ He rasped out, lower and gruffier than he had expected. He was surprised when Eric turned his gaze to him and smiled at him confused but gave a friendly gesturing wave to come sit down across from him nonetheless.

‘’Ruby, right?’’ Eric looked him up and down, containing the fit of laughter that he was so desperately trying to keep in. The fucking dude in front of his face was wearing a sparkly cat costume. He covered his face in his palms and finally let a couple chuckles leave his mouth, muttering ‘’Oh my fucking god-of course your sense of humor is such shit. Look at you!’’ At this point he couldn’t control himself, he started to laugh in a fit of giggles and continued to keep his head in his hands the whole time, not daring to look at the man across from him just yet. It was so rude to laugh at someone like this, but he couldn’t help it. The guy had to of known he would illicit some kind of reaction like this when he chose to wear that outfit to their first encounter.

Kyle’s heart jumped in delight as he heard the brunette’s giggles. He was ecstatic in the fact that even though he didn’t deliberately make him laugh, it was still a win in his book that he got that laugh out of him.

He tentatively sat down in the chair opposite of Cartman and snickered a little to himself thinking about the situation as a whole. He knew he looked silly. But it didn’t matter. He just needed to remain unknown.

Eric wiped away imaginary tears from his eyes from laughing so much and sighed, ‘’Oh man. I haven’t laughed like that in awhile. Thanks man.’’ He leaned back in his own chair still looking at this sparkly cat guy in front of him and mused aloud, ‘’So you really are sticking to the anonymous thing on the app huh?’’ ‘’Well, until I feel like I can trust you, I think it’s better you just don’t know my identity.’’ He retorted, smirking. His gravely way of talking had him pick up the other glass on the table, assuming it was meant for him and take long sip. Just as he’d thought, chocolate milk. He smiled to himself knowing all too well that was a very Eric Cartman thing to order. 

Their conversation had started out slow enough, but pretty soon the plates were empty and their drinks had already been refilled twice and now the waiter had dropped the bill and left with their dirty plates. Eric pulled out his wallet, slamming down two twenties and a five, ‘’This was such a good evening Ruby,’’ he raised an eyebrow and looked as though he wanted to ask something but shook his head before he said something he might regret. Kyle noticed and leaned towards him, ‘’Got something you wanna ask beautiful?’’ He tilted his head. And though Cartman couldn’t see it, he raised his eyebrow in curiosity.

‘’No I mean-well yeah,’’ Eric’s hazel eyes darted up and down the man’s body ‘’ would you mind if I called you Kitty?’’ His cheeks flushed red with embarrassment the second he had asked it. Immediately the redhead was laughing in long awkward chuckles at just the thought of Eric calling him that every single time he saw him, it made him reminisce on when he used to yell at his old cat back when they were kids. No, no way did he want Cartman calling for him in that shrill voice that he used for complaining about his animal all those years ago. Once he quieted down some he gave a small cough and chuckled a little more before he breathed out, ‘’I’m sorry but Kitty is just simply off the table. How about I give you a happy in-between and you can call me Mister Cat?’’ 

Eric held his head in his palms, the flood of embarrassment too incredibly present on his face for him to lift his head just yet. 

Kyle stood out of his seat now and walked to the other side of the table where he observed the brunette. His ears were red, probably from embarrassment he’d guessed and he didn’t make it any easier on him by laughing so hard and so much. He gently touched the other’s back and Cartman looked up at him slowly, his face a bright shade of red and his mouth pulled taut into a deep frown. ‘’. . . No? How about Mister Kitty then?’’ ‘’That . . . Would work. Yeah, that’s pretty good too.’’ Eric’s face suddenly started to fill back in with it’s usual color and he smiled up at the big tall cat man who in return gave a light-hearted smile back, ‘’Sorry dude, that was like super embarrassing just now what I said-and my reaction.’’ He pinched the bridge of his nose and inhaled deeply. 

‘’Well, it’s getting pretty late.’’ The brunette mumbled as he flipped open his phone to check the time before stuffing it back into his jean pocket. ‘’Oh yeah, so it is. Can I walk you part of the way home?’’ Kyle flashed the other such a lovely grin, how was Cartman to say no to that? He stood up from the table and began to walk around the IHop, calling over his shoulder, ‘’Well, lets go.’’ 

And just like that Kyle Broflovski and Eric Cartman had found themselves walking down the streets laughing and talking as they walked towards their homes, the sound of buzzing street lamps flickering and fading out as their footsteps followed, any other noise being drowned out by their presence. The air was warm and the moon was ever present in the sky, half-shown. Dark.

It was about twenty minutes from their homes when it happened. Kyle couldn’t remember who had started what, but there he was, two fingers deep inside Eric’s ass, scissoring them and penetrating him over and over again, trying to stretch him out. His lips were claimed again as the brunette buried his hands into the back of the mask, trying to deepen the kiss as much as he could, ‘’Ah-Oh god, I think-I think I’m ready-please, please fuck me!’’ His eyes were so dazed, lips pursed as he drew out slow moans and Kyle didn’t need to be told twice. He stopped himself before he pulled the leotard off, knowing Eric would more than likely be able to recognize his body, especially with that scar on his stomach. His fingers slid out gently from Cartman’s ass and he faced him towards the brick wall, ‘’I’m sorry I won’t be able to see much of your beautiful face from this position,’’ he panted out, tugging at the sequin straps and sliding the garment just below his waist where he slid his tights down as well to reveal his rock-hard member already leaking pre-cum, ‘’but I just can’t risk you knowing who I am.’’ He grabbed Eric’s hips, noticing he still had love handles, but noticing even more just how soft his skin was, ‘’Fuck you’re so beautiful.’’ He growled out possessively as he leaned forward and kissed Eric’s shoulder right before nibbling on it, making his way to his neck. ‘’P-Please. . .Puh-puhlease M-mister Kitty. . . Fuck me.’’ Cartman was begging now, trembling in the redhead’s arms as he continued to bite and mark his neck, giving light sucks here and there, finally he stopped at the shell of his ear, licking it softly and garnering another shiver from Eric he purred, ‘’Your wish is my command.’’ And with that he grabbed his own member and quickly aligned it with Cartman’s hole. He had never had sex before, but he knew enough from books and pornos that Kenny always forced him to watch what he should be doing. The tip very slowly began to go into his hole, and god give him the strength not to just plunge his whole dick in at once as the feeling of being inside Eric was already going to break him. 

‘’Oh-oh fuck-oh, oh my-‘’ Eric sucked in hot ragged breaths as he felt Kyle’s dick slowly entering his ass. He wanted him to move faster but at the same time he wanted him to just stop, it was such an odd mixture of pain and pleasure, he briefly thought of how big the thing that was going inside of him was, it felt like too much, and yet it continued to go further. Kyle looked down, his dick completely swallowed by Eric’s hole, he tightened his grip on his hips very briefly, ‘’Fuck, you feel so good inside Eric,’’ he kissed the shorter man’s back and nipped at his neck as Eric’s breaths slowed down and he mumbled out a breathy ‘’Move. Now.’’ Kyle slid out almost as agonizingly slow as he had entered, and then slammed into him, the sound of Cartman’s ass being met over and over again with Kyle’s midsection made a satisfying slapping sound and he held tight to his sides as he thrust into him, losing most if not all of his self-control, ‘’O-Oh ahhh-ah fuck!’’ He leaned down, cupping Cartman’s chin from behind as he continued to thrust into him and hungrily took in his already swollen lips against his own, the other’s drool and moans mixing into his mouth as they messily kissed each other, his other hand wrapped around the brunette’s waist and found his hard and neglected penis. He slicked over the pre-cum that was dripping from his tip all over the head and then began pumping him up and down to the rhythm of his own thrusts.

Cartman had to break the kiss then, gasping for air and letting out a particularly loud moan, ‘’Holy shiiiit!’’ 

Kyle smiled to himself hearing the man who had been his frenemy since he could remember moaning beneath him. Hell, he was moaning because of him. And fuck did that feel good. Everything felt so good right now. He kissed Eric’s cheek and panted by his ear, ‘’ Does it feel good beautiful?’’ Before the other could answer he bit down on his neck again then sucked, eliciting another loud moan out of the shorter of the two, ‘’Feels. . . So. . Hah, good’’ Cartman breathed out between pauses as he felt his knees getting weaker from his bent over position. Just then he felt a hand cup his balls, fondling them while the other continued to stroke his member and he grew even hotter if possible, the feeling of the thick cock inside him, the grunts and moans and kisses that littered his body, most of all the feeling of being wanted so desperately by someone else, it was too much, all too much, he felt like he was going to explode, ‘’I-I’m gonna-oh fuck, I’m gonna cum!’’ Hot white streaks of semen painted the wall and dripped onto the other’s hand. ‘’Oh god,’’ the redhead moaned as the other’s ass tightened around his dick, ‘’Fuck, I’m gonna-‘’ he couldn’t finish his sentence as he thrust as deep as he could into the brunette below him and felt his seed empty into his hole, he had to put both of his hands above Eric’s head on the wall as to not just collapse into the smaller man. Who knew sex was so exhausting? 

When he regained his composure he looked down at Cartman’s frame, his member limp and still inside him, back covered in sweat and bite marks that he made, his neck bruised with hickeys and nips to his delicate skin, his cheeks were flushed and his lips were parted and red, swollen from kissing. And he just looked so god damn beautiful. ‘Fuck’ he thought to himself, ‘this wasn’t what was supposed to happen.’


	2. Little Miss Optimistic!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, all of that certainly was unexpected, wasn’t it?

Kyle sat in his bed eyes wide and searching. He looked down at his hands which seemed so far away from his body. Guilt looming above his head like a tidal wave ready to take him under. He had just fucked Eric Cartman. He looked to the left side of him where the scrunched up ball of red and glitter sat. He thought it over again, he had fucked Eric Cartman. The sparkle of the leotard practically glared at him from the side. Correction. He had fucked Eric Cartman, and Eric didn’t even know it was him. 

He put his hands into his hair and pulled at the strands stiffly, he wondered why he had done what he did. He wondered what would happen the next time he saw the chubby brunette. How would he be able to face him? What would happen if he found out it was him? He shook his head, the idea of Eric telling people about it and them believing him was just so low it wouldn’t matter if he tried to tell others. But what would he do if he found out? Kyle bit his lip, he figured the worst he could do is make him eat his parents-but Eric had already done that to Scott. What were the odds of him doing the same thing over again? And if he did do anything to him, Kyle’s point from the beginning would be proven. Wouldn’t it? Or would it all not matter because his own actions were so deplorable that of course the only sane thing to do in Cartman’s position would be to react violently and senselessly? He tied a towel around his waist and made his way to the restroom, continuing to wonder about this whole mess he’d gotten himself into.

Not that far down from his own house though, Eric Cartman was in the shower, rinsing off the rest of his body as the images of what had transpired just an hour earlier continued to flood his mind. His body ached painfully, and he was glad that there was plenty of hot water to run down his backside since that area hurt the most. As the water hit his skin, he thought deeply about what had just happened. He never thought of himself to be someone who just let anyone use his body, so then why did he let that guy use it? He didn’t even know him. And yet, he felt so comfortable around him, so relaxed. He thought back to the conversations they had with ease, and how. . . Sincere the man sounded when he called him beautiful. It made his heart flutter. Was he so starved for validation and affection that he just let himself get carried away by the first person who gave him their time of day? Not just anyone either, some guy he literally didn’t know; and that wasn’t even in a ‘just get to know you’ kind of way either, he literally didn’t know his real name or even what he looked like. He wore a sequined cat outfit and pink bunny slippers. He knew of no one who owned either of those things. He also smelled so familiar, trying to think back of where he smelled that scent before he couldn’t quite recall. But he knew that scent for sure. Maybe it was someone he knew? 

His eyes widened at the thought of someone he knew, fucking him. Someone he saw at school regularly enough that there was familiarity there. Watching as he did lewd things to them and had even more lewd things done to him in turn. He felt hot and embarrassed at the thought. But also a little happy. He’d thought all this time practically everyone at school either didn’t notice him or hated him. Well, everyone but his friends. However, knowing that somewhere in those hallways, someone roamed, and saw him, maybe even admired and adored him from afar had his heartstrings pulled tight, overflowing with joy. 

He turned the faucet off and stepped out of the shower, wrapping his towel around his torso and walking back to his room. The second he closed his door behind him he darted for his phone that was carelessly tossed onto the edge of his bed, he tapped the screen to see if he had any new messages from Mister Ruby Jade, pursing his lips he gave a short sigh as he didn’t see any.

Well, it hadn’t been that long since he himself just got home, perhaps the other wasn’t home himself yet. Or perhaps he was home but was so exhausted like he was, that instead of showering, he fell asleep. Eric’s mind continued to wander from one questioning thought to another. He felt so weird, so strange waiting for attention from this person. But he guessed that’s just what happens to you when that person takes your virginity. For the third time that night he put his face into his hands, completely and utterly flustered over everything. School tomorrow was going to be interesting.

The next morning both boys were standing at the bus stop, cheeks flushed from the cold, at least that was true for one of them. 

Kyle didn’t usually engage with Eric too much in the mornings, not until Stan or Kenny joined them. But this morning he felt emboldened to strike up conversation. He just felt so unsettled and awkward, even if Cartman didn’t. ‘’Hey fatass, you coming to my birthday party next Saturday?’’ He choked out, unable to think of any other conversation to bring up, as speaking about yesterday even in general would more than likely cause them both to give the other away to something. And he didn’t want Eric getting suspicious of him so early. Despite that, the brunette looked at him with slight suspicion, ‘’Is this a formal invitation Kahl?’’ He raised his eyebrows looking at his tall companion. Kyle looked down at his feet and scoffed, ‘’Since when do I ever formally invite you to anything? You always just show up without warning.’’ Eric beamed at that, ‘’Well, maybe I wouldn’t just come to these things out of the blue if I was just invited.’’ He crossed his arms, ‘’It wouldn’t be a surprise every time I showed up then.’’ His honey colored eyes studied Kyle’s green as he waited for a response and just like in his middle school years his mind wandered too deep into that gaze, getting lost so easily. The world around him getting quieter and quieter, all sounds fading to the back.

He could see Kyle’s lips moving but he was too focused on those eyes of his to really pay attention to what he was saying. All those years ago in middle school, things had come to a head for him one day while he wandered the halls of their middle school. He’d just been dismissed from the counselors office talking to Mr. Mackey about how just because another student is getting more attention and credit for something he didn’t do himself it does not warrant a ‘call to arms’ war to cyberbully the child with hundreds of accounts taking the ‘credit’ for his conception. Boiling it down to his mother being a filthy whore who couldn’t keep her legs closed. And while that was definitely true for Eric’s mother, the same could not be said for the other kid’s mom. It wasn’t nice and he shouldn’t of done it, blah blah. He rolled his eyes at the whole speech, and sighed as he continued his stroll down the hall to his class. 

He was shoved very suddenly into the lockers to his left and his head smacked clean against the metal, jolting his head forward quickly to press his hands on where it hurt. He looked up at his assailant, almost laughing at the eyes that stared him down so coldly. ‘’And what pray tell is this all about Gary?’’ Eric chuckled smugly.

Gary’s eyes narrowed at the fat kid beneath his form and balled his fist even tighter into his sweater, ‘’You know damn well what this is about Cartman. I told you not to mess with Ronnie, and yet here you are. Butting yourself into things that are none of your business and making Ronnie feel like shit about his mother.’’ His grip tightened even more as he slammed back Eric’s head once more against the locker. ‘’Now you’ll learn to take my warnings more seriously fat boy.’’ 

The brunette was about to retort with a ‘hey don’t call me fat!’ But before he could even open his mouth his body had been lifted up and tossed onto the floor. His head pounded from the sudden movement and throbbed from the force of the banging against the metal. Eyes in a daze, he tried to refocus on the looming figure above him and lifted his arm to grab for a foot. He was met with a sickeningly sharp kick to his ribs and a boot suddenly twisting back and forth on that same hand, grinding it into the tile floor and proceeding to snap a finger or two in the process. His hand felt hot and it throbbed with such intensity that he began to cry. 

‘’Oh poor little baby gonna sob now over a couple of kicks? Hm?’’ Gary bent down and gently wiped away a tear from one of Cartman’s cheeks before grabbing a fistful of hair and slamming his head back down into the floor. 

Eric didn’t know it at the moment, but he could definitely guess his head was bleeding by now, and he squirmed at the thought. The raven haired boy dug his nails deeper into his scalp ‘’Hey, stop movin’ piggy.’’ Eric considered just passing out right then and there.

There was a sudden gasp and Gary let go of his hair. ‘’Oh-who in the fuck?!’’ The older kid looked up from the ground he had suddenly been pushed down onto. There stood Kyle Broflovski, a look of pure distaste stretched across his face.

He looked pissed. 

‘’Hey if you’re thinking of stopping me from continuing to beat up this fat piece of-‘’ his sentence was cut off as Kyle slammed his head down into the tile and leaned down threateningly by his face, ‘’What was that, Gary?’’ 

The other looked up at Kyle’s form and gave a low whimper, ‘’N-nevermind then! I’m finished with him anyway!’’ He struggled in Kyle’s grip and slowly the redhead stood up and let him go, never one to continue with violence, he glared him down the whole time he left, making sure he was a man of his word and would be leaving the crumpled form of Eric on the ground alone. 

Once the raven haired boy had ran out of view Kyle knelt down next to Eric’s body. ‘’Hey fatass,’’ how low his voice was at that moment, the nickname carried no weight to it. Why was he being so nice? Golden eyes flickered open and darted to the right as they studied his savior’s expression and he couldn’t help but chuckle lightly, crying lightly in the process, ‘’Well isn’t that just a bitch. Saved by the dirty Jew.’’ But just like Kyle, the weight of his words fell flat. His voice hoarse and strained from the crying. He was so grateful for him just then.

Kyle took him to the hospital after that, he was speechless a majority of the time, but once he confirmed that Cartman’s mom would be there any minute he decided it was time to leave. He made his way out of the room slowly, before turning his heel and walking back over to the bedside as quick as he could, ‘’Hey,’’ he said low and sharp, ‘’You need to keep yourself out of trouble. Even with stupid pranks like the one you pulled on Ronnie. It’s gonna get you killed.’’ He looked away from Eric’s confused face just then, ‘’I won’t be there to save you all the time. Even if I hate you, I still don’t want to be the one standing over your coffin.’’ His green eyes shifted back over and the chubbier boys eyes were closed, small intakes of breath and parted lips indicated he’d just fallen back asleep. Kyle held his hand over Eric’s bandaged one, softly, ‘’Please. Stay out of trouble Eric.’’ And he was gone. The brunettes eyes fluttered back open and he smiled a little. Kyle Broflovski cared about him. After all the fighting and death threats and name calling and shitty pranks, it was worth it to know that in the end, the redhead really did care for his well-being. 

He told himself he’d change after that. Before high school, he’d be better, he’d get better, if anything to save his own ass. But even more so to prove to Kyle that he could. 

After that day, he always found himself staring at the other boy, some kind of fixation he thought. Maybe an obsession. Even scarier so, maybe a fondness. Whatever it was, it drew all of his attention any time the Jewish boy was around.

He touched Kyle’s cheek fondly, incredibly deep in his own world, but relishing the touch. 

‘’Dude! Cartman! What the heck dude?!’’ Kyle’s sudden shift and pull from his hand had him snap out of whatever daydreams he had going on, ‘’Oh man Kahl, fuck dude, I’m sorry-that was super gay.’’ He looked down at his feet, feeling stupid and angry at himself for being the kind of mess he was. 

‘’Just don’t do shit like that again asshole.’’ Kyle gingerly touched his cheek, as if the very action would burn his whole hand off. His mind was swirled with images of Eric’s sticky skin and bruised lips, he glanced at the shorter man beside him, ogling at his frame and how he’d guessed those hips of his were bruised with the marks that he left there. He could feel himself getting turned on and had to scold himself for the dirty thoughts his mind continued to conjure up. 

The laughs of Stan and Kenny cut the tension that hung thickly in the already thick air and both Kyle and Eric breathed sighs of relief at the other duos presence.

Stan was the first to speak, ‘’ Dude, Kyle! Hey did you find anything?’’ Kyle’s face briefly flashed in confusion, ‘’Find any-oh!’’ He blushed, ‘’No-no not yet. But I’ve been looking. Dude there’s so many women on here. It’s gonna be super hard to find her.’’ He took out his phone and tapped on the app, the first image appearing being a picture of a woman in a field of flowers throwing her head back as she made a sensual face at the camera. Kyle swiped left, ‘’See dude, it’s chicks like these for just-for forever.’’ He continued to show him the many other women, swiping as Stan barely acknowledged their faces. He wasn’t interested in seeing other women. Just as long as he didn’t see his woman on there. ‘’What’re all these women doing on here anyways?’’ He thought aloud as he took the phone from Kyle and looked at the description one of the women had put. ‘’They’re just looking for sex.’’ Kenny commented happily, suddenly standing beside Stan and Kyle, staring down at his own phone and showing them his open messages, ‘’See look. The second I match with someone, they all just keep asking to see my dick.’’ He nodded his head proudly, ‘’And after that, they all just want a ride.’’ He laughed at that. ‘’Dude I’m serious-‘’ ‘’And I am too!’’ Kenny quipped, ‘’I have tried just talking like a normal fucking person to some of these girls and it’s like all their minds register is sex and dick. No one wants to just chat. They’re lonely and craving intimacy. . . Well, or ugly and craving intimacy because they’re desperate. ‘’ he shrugged, ‘’Either one.’’ Kyle noticed Eric shift slightly at the blonde’s comments, was that true for him to? 

Just then the bus pulled up and Kyle snatched his phone back from Stan, the taller of the two giving him a roll of the eyes, ‘’You better tell me if you find her dude.’’ Kyle nodded his head, ‘’Yeah yeah, I know.’’ ‘’No im serious Kyle, if what Kenny is saying is true, you gotta tell me-promise me you’ll tell me if you find her on that app.’’ The redhead raised his eyebrow for a split second, ‘’Alright. I promise dude. Really got you worked up huh?’’ ‘’Dude she’s been avoiding me like the plague for the past week it feels like!’’ He put his head between his knees and hands, clearly frustrated, ‘’It’s not like her to do this kind of thing!’’ Oh no, Stan was getting upset. 

Kenny passed by the seats where Kyle and Stan sat and sat at the back of the bus, Eric following behind him. 

‘’Stan’s so whipped dude.’’ He eyed over at Cartman, ‘’That girl has Stan’s whole life in the palm of his hands man, like it’s nothing. Pathetic right?’’ 

The brunette shrugged his shoulders, ‘’Yeah, seems pretty pathetic to me. He’s just so-‘’ he puckered his lips in thought, ‘’Trusting.’’ The word left his mouth like bile running down his throat, ‘’I just don’t get it Kenny. How does someone get to that point.’’ He gestured wildly at Stan, ‘’I mean, he’s so desperate to make sure she’s not doing anything suspicious behind his back that he literally made his best friend download an app for hookups.’’ He shook his head, ‘’Maybe I’m just too stupid to get it.’’ 

Kenny patted Eric on the shoulder, ‘’Nah dude. You’ve changed a lot. I think once you meet someone like Stan has with Wendy-you’ll get it.’’ Kenny was ever reassuring, always the optimistic one of the group. 

Eric smiled, ‘’Thanks Kenny.’’


	3. Running On Lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some things just never change.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, I’ve re-written quite a few things in these chapter again and again. So, hopefully it’s good now c:

The boys had made it through the day with ease. Lunch was already approaching and Eric was thankful for the relatively quick periods in which he and Kyle were both in. He still felt somewhat awkward about touching him earlier, but another part of him was thrilled by the fact that the redhead hadn’t cut his hand off or anything of the sort. But now every time he was looking at or speaking to the taller boy, the other would become flushed and make up some excuse to not talk to him or to go stand by someone else in the class. He hadn’t thought Kyle was that disgusted by him touching his person, but with the way he was acting, it definitely felt like it wasn’t wanted. He wasn’t wanted. If he could just get any direct time with Kyle, it was going to be lunch and he had to ask him if he made things weird. He just had to.

The bell rang up over the school and they all headed out of the classroom. That is, until an arm wrapped it’s way around Eric’s chest.

‘’Where do you think you’re going, my little chubby bunny?’’ 

Dread plastered itself all over the brunette’s face and he turned his head to look back at the culprit of such a reaction, Gary Borschwick. This guy never gave up, and to make matters worse he had his own little crew. Since Craig and Tweek had become a couple in middle school, one they moved up into high school, it seemed like things got more serious and Craig was no longer the leader to his little group of followers he had before. To Eric’s dismay the very same person who beat the daylights out of him in middle school had taken reins of leading the gang, and he brought with him two companions that he knew too well by now. 

‘’I was just gonna go get some lunch wi-‘’ ‘’Oh now Cartman, why would you even consider eating anything from the cafeteria when I’ve got something more nutritious for you just waiting to be taken into that delicious mouth of yours?’’ Gary purred against the back of his neck, his arm squeezing the smaller male even more. 

This was normal. This had been happening since he entered high school. He just didn’t understand why it was Gary that did it. Torturing him endlessly, he never left bruises, was keen on not leaving marks, especially anything bloody-not since the incident in middle school. 

Eric thought deep down that he was probably still afraid of the wrath in Kyle’s eyes. And he wondered now what Kyle would do if he saw him in this state. Dragged off to the boys’ bathroom with little to no protest, Gary’s friends standing guard outside of the door while he shoved his dick into Eric’s mouth. His hazel eyes remained calm and indifferent to the whole thing. He was too used to this by now. He often started to wonder what life would be like if his days weren’t spent like this. 

Today he thought back to his encounter with that cat man, and he blushed. Closing his eyes, Eric imagined it being him instead of Gary. He grazed his teeth along the base gently and took in as much as he could of the member, sucking fiercely like it was his only purpose in life. He could hear Gary’s shocked moans and curses under his breath and he thought of how the masked man gripped his hair, firm yet gentle, like he didn’t want to hurt him in any way. The brunette hummed in response, swirling his tongue back to the tip as he did. He wrapped a hand around Gary’s dick and stroked him as he sucked at the tip. Mister Kitty was so nice to him, his lean and tall stature was the perfect physique to pair with Cartman’s own. And his smell, Kyle flashed in his fantasy, he smelled like Kyle, that’s where he recognized the scent, the redhead smelled similar if not the same as Mister Kitty. 

Eric’s imagination ran wild at this point and it was now Kyle above him asking for more, gently touching his cheeks and coercing him into finishing him off. He bobbed his head as fast as could and with every bob he stroked his hands up after. Kyle’s face was so lewd and serene in his mind, and then his hair was pulled roughly while Gary cussed above him and he remembered where he was. Eyes flickering open he looked at Gary as he came in his mouth. The taste bothered the brunette a lot. He didn’t know how to describe it but it was disgusting and he had hoped that because he did such a good job today that the raven haired man would let him off easy and allow him to spit his semen out. But Gary’s cold blue eyes looked down at the brunette, clearly waiting for him to swallow. And so he did. Shivering and almost throwing it back up in the process. 

Gary smiled pulling his pants back up and buckling them. He bent down towards the smaller male, ‘’Hey, thanks for that.’’ He kissed Eric’s mouth and grinned, ‘’God you were so good today.’’ His hands wandered to Eric’s backside, ‘’Maybe we should go further next time since you were so into it.’’ Eric looked down at his pants, his erection clearly showing through the fabric of his tight jeans, ‘’No that’s fine-really.’’ His head tilted further into his chest in shame and Gary’s laugh echoed through the bathroom, ‘’Fuck you’re so pathetic Cartman. But sure,’’ he purred into his ear and nibbled on it, ‘’Maybe we’ll wait a bit for that huh?’’ He smacked his back and got up heading out of the bathroom, ‘’You should get yourself cleaned up quick, looks like one of your friends is coming to take a piss.’’ He laughed even more and the sound bounced off the walls and stabbed into Eric’s ears like daggers.

He quickly stood up at that, ‘’Oh shit-ohshitohshit fucking damnit!’’ He groaned in pain as his already bruised knees screamed in agony from being on the tile floor. He grimaced when he turned and got a good look at his face. He had cum on his chin dripping from his mouth along with saliva and his hair was in disarray with sweat. He turned on the sink and scrubbed his face as much as he could. His backpack lay beside the farthest stall, being tossed aside by Gary, he picked it up and grabbed out the travel size toothbrush and toothpaste he started keeping with him ever since the end of Freshman year. He frowned. Didn’t think he’d need them for all four years of high school. 

Quickly he squeezed the tube and then placed the brush into his mouth, scrubbing as quick as he could before spitting everything out and throwing the toothbrush and paste back into his bag. As he zipped his front pocket closed Kenny entered the room. 

‘’Oh hey Eric.’’ He smiled, hands in his pockets as he looked at the shorter male in surprise. 

‘’Hey Kenny. I was just-‘’ ‘’Nah man. Don’t even sweat it. I saw those assholes leaving. I’m sure they tried to do something again huh?’’ He tilted his head at him curiously. ‘’Oh yeah,’’ Eric chuckled, ‘’ They tried alright. Those bastards. Got nothing better to do than pick on me.’’ The blonde nodded in agreement, ‘’I just don’t get it. Why they constantly try to get a rile out of you just irks me. They’re such dicks. Dicks to be dicks I guess.’’ He shrugged, ‘’Oh, by the way, Kyle was asking where you were.’’ 

‘’Kyle?? Kyle was asking?’’ His eyes practically fell out of their sockets as he gaped like a fish at Kenny. ‘’Yeah, I thought it was weird too but I think it’s just cause of the bullying those assholes basically brag about doing to you.’’ His eyes looked over to the stalls, ‘’Anyways, I gotta shit. So.’’ 

Eric didn’t need to hear anymore, not to mention he didn’t want to be there when it started to smell, he walked out of the bathroom and made his way to the usual lunch table that his small group of friends always sat at. 

Stan immediately beamed, ‘’Cartman, Cartman-come over here. Dude, you gotta see this!’’ The brunette walked over to the other side of the table in-between the redhead and Stan and his face immediately froze at what he saw. Gary’s face was the only thing on the screen, he was throwing up a rock sign and sticking his tongue out. ‘’Can you believe it? This asshole is on the app! He’s on the app! Oh man and his bio is so fucking fake!’’ His stomach lurched the longer he looked at his picture. He was on the app as well. He could find Eric on the app too than. He could access a whole new level of harassment outside of school. The actions of just 20 minutes before came to the forefront of his mind and he immediately felt bile rising in his throat, along with everything else. Scrambling for the nearest trashcan his knees buckled, weak and almost instantaneously he found himself vomiting all over the cafeteria floor by their table. A trashcan 10 feet away. His stomach continued to lurch and the vomit came right along with it with every heave. He could hear the sneers and gagging and mocking of the other teenagers around him. He could die of embarrassment and shame right then and there. But then he felt three hands on his shoulders and back. He didn’t even look up to know that Stan and Kyle were standing by him, squeezing his shoulders for support while one of them rubbed his back, he closed his eyes in relief. At least he still had them.

After he could no longer throw up anymore he whirled his head around to look up at his friends, Stan looked on with a mix of worry and disgust and Kyle looked more concerned than anything, his thumbs ran under the brunette’s eyes briefly, wiping away tears he didn’t even realize were streaming down his face. He took comfort in those quick touches. 

‘’Holy shit dude!’’ Kenny yelled as he approached the three of them. ‘’Jesus Cartman-are you ok dude?’’ He looked down at the vomit on the ground and his lips upturned in disgust, ‘’Back to the bathroom with you huh?’’ He offered a hand to the smaller male.

Kyle’s green eyes narrowed at that comment, was that where Eric had been when lunch started? The bathroom? Why had he been in there for so long though? He thought back to before Eric came into the cafeteria, he had seen Gary and his gang come in, laughing and snorting like wild pigs. It disgusted him. Every time he caught glimpse of Gary he remembered that day in middle school, he tried to avoid him at all costs after that. He just knew he’d get angry every time he saw his face. But at this moment he couldn’t recall if they were bragging about bullying someone or not, their voices an echo at the back of his head, too unimportant to bring to the surface. However, considering the timing of when Eric came in and how messy his hair was, how miserable he had looked and why he looked even worse when Stan showed him Gary’s picture, Kyle had a feeling him and his group were the reason he was being held up. His fist curled and uncurled as he started to get angry. What in the hell gave them the right to fuck with Eric like that? Hadn’t that asshole learned to stay away from him after what happened in middle school? He looked over at the brunette who was walking to the bathroom with Kenny and Stan. No, this was partially his fault too. He looked down at the tile in frustration. He’d known that Eric was being bullied, he just didn’t figure it was actually effecting him. That they were actually getting through to him. But he and the brunette had never been that close, how could he know? Eric always came to their table or group, brushing aside whatever they had done to him with a shrug or sarcastic comment. Had more been happening than what he was letting on? Fuck he was so confused and upset with himself now. Why the hell did he sleep with Eric fucking Cartman.

The redhead stared down at his open palms. If this was their fault, he’d need to confront them about it. It’s the least he could do for him.

Kyle took a deep breath and scanned the cafeteria, searching for the raven haired boy and his little gang. With no luck he asked everyone else in the cafeteria directly, ‘’Hey! Anyone know where the fuck Gary and his little posse is?!’’ Hundreds of heads turned left and right before someone spoke up, ‘’Uh, I saw where they went Kyle!’’ ‘’Tell me which way Butters, those fuckers are gonna pay!’’ The redhead marched his way over to where the spunky blonde sat, and the other stiffened upon his approach. ‘’Uh-uh y-yes sir! Well him and his friends went out to get some air-I’m pretty sure I heard them talking about hanging out in the field to practice their tosses or-or something like that!’’ He looked up at Kyle timidly, fidgeting with his hands the way he tended to when he was nervous. The redhead nodded at the information given to him, ‘’Thanks man.’’ 

Kyle started walking out of the doors, not paying attention to the fact that now their was a mass of students following behind him. He had one thing on his mind and one thing only. Find Gary Schwartz. 

When he found the raven haired man it was as the blonde said, him and his buddies were practicing tosses on the field. Not a care in the world as the ball soared through the air and they joked back and forth with one another.

He’d stop that quickly. 

‘’Hey assholes,’’ He sneered at them as he approached their group, ‘’would you mind telling me why the FUCK you think it’s ok to mess with Cartman?!’’ He kept at least ten feet away from them as he quickly thought about how this would all go down if he were to fight them. It would be three on one but he figured he’d be able to take Gary out at least and more than likely leave some marks on the other two before they overpowered him. It wasn’t great strategy but he’d kind of forgotten that in middle school he took on the raven alone. 

Gary smirked, ‘’Oh-well isn’t this a nice surprise? Are you just now noticing your friend’s torture? Hm?’’ He grinned, ‘’Just now opened your eyes? Or did he finally cave and tell you what’s been happening to him?’’ His grin stretched even further across his face as he started to chuckle. ‘’You know, either way, this is pretty pathetic. Three years of this and it’s just now being addressed. And even now, entering into the last year of high school. . .’’ His cold eyes flickered to the crowd gathered behind Kyle and then to Kyle as he tilted his head, ‘’You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think Eric likes having my dick shoved in his mouth.’’ 

And that was it.

Kyle snapped. He’d been standing there, listening to Gary, waiting for something to finally give him the boost he needed, the added fire he wanted to feel, to justify everything he wanted to do to this fucking asshole in front of him. 

And that right there sealed his fate.

In such a swift and deliberate motion, he moved five steps forward and swung, fist aching as it collided with Gary’s face. The satisfying sound of teeth mashing together as the raven haired man’s jaw collided against the roof of his mouth. 

The fight had officially just begun and as Kyle took the first hit to the stomach, Eric sat at the nurses office, thermometer in his mouth as the nurse waited for his temperature. Stan and Kenny gave him a look of sympathy before they both took off back to the cafeteria. Hazel eyes scanned the room around him, looking down at his hands and his dirt-covered skinny jeans, the knees completely scuffed up from being on and off the floor so much, he wondered how he’d be able to get the stains out. Did they have some kind of home concoction he could put together to get out such deep stains? He’d have to look that up later. A low beep hummed in the air and the nurse walked over, taking the thermometer from his mouth. ‘’Oh my goodness!’’ She gasped, ‘’ you shouldn’t even be in school right now with how sick you are!’’ She wrote something down on a clipboard and then walked out of the room, stepping into the office and approaching one of the staff members that worked the front, speaking quickly and frantically to her while gesturing at him. He pursed his lips and raised and furrowed his eyebrows, what did she mean by that? He leaned over from where he sat, taking a peek at the clipboard she left on the desk. He looked under where it said temperature and he found himself surprised by the numbers he saw. He knew he hadn’t felt that great, but he didn’t think it was because he was actually sick. He leaned back in his seat, suddenly feeling like his body was being weighed down by bricks. 104.7. What a high number.

Eric’s mother was called to the school to come pick him up. And she was there in less than 10 minutes. Ever the eager parent to tend to the needs of her son, especially when he actually needed it. Their dynamic hadn’t changed much since middle school, she was still very much a doting mother while also being passive whenever she had company over. But their relationship was a lot stronger and more trusting since Eric straightened himself out. He was immediately smothered into a hug and an array of face kisses while his mother gave any comforting words she could think of to him. And just like that he was on his way home. Looking out of the car window he thought about what his friends were doing without him, especially Kyle who seemed the most concerned for his well-being but strangely didn’t accompany them to the office. His mind buzzed with thoughts as his eyes grew heavier and he soon was in a deep sleep. 

It wasn’t long before Stan and Kenny found the fight. They’d walked into an empty cafeteria after-all, and the second they walked outside, there was the crowd of people, gathered in a circle around Kyle and Gary’s gang. 

As they ran over to the brawl, they could see Kyle had taken quite the beating already-but then their eyes quickly assessed the other boys’ conditions and their jaws practically hit the floor. Kyle had seriously got in some good hits on all three of them. Gary’s mouth and nose were bloody, his friend Ronnie already had a massive bruise forming on his forehead, and Derek, well, from the way he hobbled and winced with every move towards the redhead they had a guess what was really hurting on him.

‘’We’re ending this now!’’ Stan stepped in, slapping away the crowd as he placed his body in front of Kyle’s that lay there, defeated on the floor. 

Gary laughed, if you could call it that. ‘’Oh is that what you’re deciding? Nah, either get the fuck out of our way, or get hit like your pussy little friend.’’ He took a step forward, but was grabbed by one of his friend’s hands to his arm, almost yanking him back. ‘’Dude what the-‘’ he looked over at Derek who shook his head and pointed his finger over to right beside Stan. Blue eyes met blue eyes and he understood. No one ever fought against Kenny McCormick, the poor tall blonde kid, any time there was a fight, he went all out because as it’s been quoted around the school, he ‘has shit ass left to lose.’ He didn’t fight like normal kids. He destroyed other kids. And that was when just he was getting picked on, god only knows what he’d do if he fought someone who was hurting his friends. The hand on his arm dug into his skin, and Gary finally let his gaze fall. ‘’Yeah, yeah ok. Fine.’’ He backed away from Kyle and Stan, ‘’But I don’t want to deal with him or your other little friend’s shit ever again.’’ He spat on the floor, the taste of metal unable to escape his mouth. ‘’Come on guys, let’s fuckin’ go.’’ He walked off the field with Ronnie and Derek, both complaining about why they had to fight that redhead to begin with. 

Stan turned around and grabbed Kyle’s upper-arm, ‘’Do you think you can stand?’’ Kenny moved beside him, following in Stan’s lead and grabbed his other upper-arm, ‘’Dude, Kyle. . .’’ The redhead looked at the blonde, his expression completely sullen and exhausted ‘’You fucked those guys up!! Hell yeah dude!’’ Kenny was grinning ear to ear, but Stan just rolled his eyes at him, ‘’Yeah but look at him-they got him too. Bunch of assholes-ganging up one on three.’’ He hoisted the redhead up and then narrowed his eyes at him, ‘’Which by the way-why the fuck didn’t you tell us you were planning to fight those dicks?!’’ 

Emerald eyes darted down at his feet,’’I didn’t even know I was going to fight them. . .’’ He looked at Stan, ‘’It’s just-dude, didn’t you see the way Cartman reacted to seeing that asshole’s face? I started to think about it and it just pissed me off!’’ Stan looked at him, confusion evident on his face, however before Kyle could further explain, Kenny spoke up, ‘’I’m pretty sure before lunch they were harassing him in the bathroom again. I don’t know how far they took it, but when I walked in there. . .’’ He paused, then looked at Stan and Kyle directly, ‘’I don’t know. Something just felt off.’’

Kyle wrapped his arms around their shoulders, ‘’Y’know, before you guys got here. . .He made a comment.’’ He grit his teeth as he mauled over Gary’s words. ‘’He said that I was pathetic for just now noticing that something was wrong with Eric. That if he didn’t know any better. . . Eric liked having his dick shoved in his mouth. . .’’ He was angry again just thinking about it and he felt disgusted repeating it to his friends.

‘’Dude, Kyle, you don’t think. . .?’’ Stan squeezed Kyle’s arm lightly, trying to find some hint of a joke or doubt-something that would stop this knot from forming in his stomach. 

‘’I-I don’t know Stan! He didn’t say it like he was joking though. . . And if he wasn’t . . .’’ He looked at both of his friends faces, ‘’Then this is a problem that can’t be solved with just fighting. It’s a hell of a lot bigger than just bullying, that’s for damn sure.’’ 

Kenny turned his head towards the others and quietly spoke, ‘’What the fuck are we gonna do guys?’’

All three boys looked down at their feet, wondering what they could do to help Eric. 

A buzzing sound interrupted their silence, breaking the tension that lingered in the air, thick and full of dread and uncertainty. All three checked their pockets for their phones. Kyle brought his phone to his face and saw a new notification, ‘You’ve got a message!’ It was from Eric. He felt his face grow hot as he remembered who he appeared to the brunette as and his mind raced to places it shouldn’t. It wasn’t appropriate to think of things like that at this time. Especially when he himself was so riddled with guilt for what he’d done to him. Even if it was consensual. Who fucking knew he’d have to re-think his entire perception of who Eric was in just two fucking days? He put his phone away quickly, he’d have to message him in a bit. But first, he had to calm down and clean himself up.


	4. Bird Cage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyle’s too nosy and Eric’s too willing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m so so sorry for the late late update! If this chapter sounds scrambled or not enough PLEASE tell me! I’ve just been stressed, signed up for college, started a new job and my grandma passed away a week ago, her funeral is the 22nd, so I’ve just been really under the pressure. But I do want criticism if you have it, I feel so jumbled with this chapter. Any feedback is appreciated! And I’ll try to update once every Thursday or Friday from now on c:!

Kyle sat at the kitchen table in his house, bandages and gauze littered his face. He also had a makeshift brace for his left wrist, courtesy of Ronnie attempting to snap it in half but obviously not having the strength or ability to do so. When he initially got home his mother almost had a heart attack. She’d paled at the sight of him covered in all the bandages and had immediately began to question everything that happened, worried for her son’s life and his safety. When he finally admitted it was a fight at school against three other boys that was the cause of all of it, she reared her body towards the house phone, dialing the school as she stared at her son. But Kyle’s eyes pleaded and begged for her to just drop it, his mouth pulling tight into a worried expression as he tried to tell him mom that calling the school would be doing him more harm than good. He didn’t want Eric getting into anymore trouble with those bastards than he was already in. Sheila had lowered the phone away from her ear briefly, hesitation evident in the way her hand lingered not far from the receiver. She’d decided on putting the phone back but sat down and confronted him directly, asking what happened and why he felt she would make things worse for him, as vaguely as he could, he explained what happened that day. Eric being gone for most of their lunch, walking into the cafeteria only moments after his well-known bullies had entered. He tried his best to explain this app that Stan had, not him, which altho technically true also wasn’t true at all. But he didn’t want his mother knowing he had that kind of thing on his phone. She’d freak out even more. He’d explained the picture of the main bully and how Eric became sick just looking at it. How he was angry with himself for not noticing his friend being so effected by those guys. His anger and shame that just took over him so quickly. And then the fight. When he was done talking about it all, he sighed, clearly upset all over again and his mom just nodded her head silently. She stood up from where she was sitting and gave his shoulder a squeeze before kissing him on the forehead, ‘’I understand Bubby. You were just looking out for you friend,’’ she paused and furrowed her brows ‘’but fighting is not the answer. Figure out another way to help Eric. And if you need help with anything, I’m here.’’ She picked up her glass of tea she’d had set off to the side and made her way out of the kitchen into the living room.

He hadn’t noticed it but he let out a breath he didn’t even know he had been holding. He felt relieved to tell his mom about the situation, even if it wasn’t in full detail. 

His phone suddenly buzzed in his right pocket and he grabbed it out, completely forgetting about his message from Eric earlier.

There was a text from Stan and Kenny in a group-chat. 

Kenny: hey so wut r we doin about Eric? ?

Stan: what do you mean dude? we can’t do shit until we actually know what’s going on

Kenny: right right

Kenny: so then how do we find out wuts goin on? 

Kyle hovered his fingers over the keyboard, he knew it might backfire in his face but he thought he might as well try. After all, since his perspective has shifted so much in just 24 hours of who Eric actually was, he felt the character he created could be put towards better use than trying to prove the shorter male was still an evil piece of shit. 

He typed.

Kyle: Guys I think I know a way that we can find out what’s happening with him. . . But you gotta promise not to be weird about it.

Stan: idk where this is going, but if it’s weird I make no promises on not saying anything

Kyle kind of expected that. 

Kenny: ya ok dude wuts the plan? 

He ran his hand through his hair that stuck out from under his ushanka and then proceeded to remove the hat completely in his newfound nervousness.

His fingers tensed as his hovered over the keyboard in his hands and began to type.

Kyle: Ok, so this might sound weird but I could use my fake account that I created on that one app to try and get Eric to open up about what’s going on with him. . . 

He sighed loudly as he pressed the send button and immediately waited in anticipation as he read ‘typing’ coming from both his friends.

Stan: what makes you think he would just tell you about his problems and stuff? you would be a complete stranger dude 

Kenny: if this is the only idea idk ive got nothing better

But Eric already trusts the fake guy he created, he grit his teeth, of course that’s not something they would know though.

Kyle: It’s worth a shot if anything. I just want to help him however I can. And I know he’s on the app so. . .

Kenny: thats true ! i think u should try it cus idk wut else to do

Stan: I’m not sure dude, thats risky territory I feel like but if it backfires at all its all on you k?

He sighed in such relief that he felt his body heave forward with the weight of his worries falling off him. 

His phone buzzed again in his hands and he tapped the screen automatically, the message from Eric popping onto the screen. 

Eric C.: Hey Mister cat-man

Eric C.: Are you not talking to me now? Was what happened between us too much? I’m sorry if I seem like some desperate whore to you. Idk what came over me. If you want to stop talking to me or seeing me or whatever that’s fine. . . 

Kyle’s chest tightened and his hand instinctively clutched at the front of his shirt, inhaling sharply. What was this feeling? Guilt? Pity? Sadness? He felt like a terrible person, like he did something wrong. Ignoring Eric for just a couple hours-no, not ignoring, that wasn’t right. He forgot. He put him aside for the time being while he got other things sorted out. Yet still, his message sent a tidal wave of crushing emotions over his well-being. 

He needed to reply immediately.

Mister Ruby Jade: Hey beautiful! Sorry for the late reply, I didn’t mean to upset you so. I was at work and I just got home, my phone was off until just five minutes ago, please forgive me. 

He stood up from his seat, unable to control his nerves as he hoped Eric would buy the lie and continue speaking to him.

Eric C.: Oh shit, I’m sorry. Man I must’ve sounded really clingy right now. I’m sorry. It’s fine. Don’t worry about it. 

Beaming in excitement Kyle headed to the fridge and grabbed a bottle of water, all his nerves feeling fried caused his mouth to go dry, like his blood under his skin was being soaked up, not pumping fast enough, or pumping too fast and now there was nothing else left to keep him together. 

Just as his heart was settling down some, Eric sent him another message.

Eric C.: I know you like, just got home and all from work. But could we hang out again today? 

He feels his heart thrum against his ribcage so hard he feels it might fall out. Setting aside his water he mauls over the idea of meeting Eric again today. His hands ache and so does his face and he thinks about those assholes and what they’ve done to him and Eric and his mind is reeling again.

He’s already headed upstairs as he quickly types his reply.

Mister Ruby Jade: I would love to meet again! Same place as last time, 5:30?

~~~~

Eric’s legs are shaking as he sits at the same table behind the same restaurant he met this ‘’Mister Kitty’’ guy at last time. He’s anxious and upset. He keeps picking at his finger nails, gnawing on the end of them and then inspecting their lengths and tearing at skin that should stay in one place. He can’t control how anxious he feels. But his nails, he can control that. And so he does.

Brown hair tussles in the wind and he feels exposed and cold as he looks around and checks his phone for the 90th time in the last 10 minutes that he’s been here.

Suddenly, he hears something. Footsteps. They approach quickly and he sits up straighter awaiting a shiny, sparkly, glimmer of red accompanied by giant pink bunny slippers. Instead, he’s greeted to an oversized jacket hiding the gleam and glam bedazzled leotard and sweatpants that do not at all fit the waist they are on. His eyes dart down and where he found goofy eyes and floppy ears, there is now plain white socks that look to be brand new tucked inside of an oversized pair of slides.

The look of confusion is written all over Eric’s face as Kyle stares at him, mask covering his bandages and hand hidden inside one of the jacket pockets as to not make its condition worse by the tight gloves that match the leotard or give away that he’s injured at all. His whole forearm throbbed in place, he hoped he wouldn’t have to move it much for the rest of the day.

‘’Hi again beautiful.’’ Theres so much excitement behind his greeting he can barely manage to control the gruff exterior of his voice.

Eric’s eyes linger over his frame for a few seconds longer before he flutters his lashes up to his eyes and replies happily, ‘’Hey mister kitty, I’m so stoked you came!’’ 

There’s such a sense of calm that washes over Kyle’s body in that moment that he almost feels his legs buckle, ready and willing to give out at any moment.

He smiles wide, even if the brunette can’t tell, ‘’I’m glad you asked to meet again. And,’’ he pauses, looking down at his attire briefly before staring back into those hazel eyes, ‘’Sorry for my appearance being a little different. I was kind of in a rush.’’ He chuckles half-heartedly, hoping and praying that Cartman will take the bait. 

‘’Oh. . . Well that’s cool dude. Don’t even sweat it. It just caught me off guard a little bit. But,’’ he chuckled ‘’So did your appearance the first time I met you. ‘’ 

Kyle couldn’t help but laugh along with him. Thinking deeply about how weird the situation was in general, his fingertips touched the back of the seat in front of him and he joined Eric at the table, adjusting his arm as he maneuvered the seat closer in. 

‘’What gives?’’ He looked around, ‘’No food this time?’’ 

The brunette looked around as well, as if mocking him. ‘’What do you mean? Of course I ordered food. . . I already ate it.’’ The devious grin that spread across those plump cheeks made the other want to pinch his face. He was too adorable for his own good. Or no-not adorable, Kyle felt himself getting embarrassed at his own thoughts, cheeks burning as he tried to correct himself in his head that Eric wasn’t adorable, he was, annoying. He rolled his eyes and shrugged, ‘’Well, guess I’ll just starve then. Such a shame too after walking all the way out here. I was really looking forward to your company and a nice chat over some delicious food. . .’’ He feigned annoyance, ‘’Guess I better just go home then.’’ He made a gesture as if to stand up when Eric’s hand touched the back of his own, ‘’No-no! Don’t go, I was just joking,’’ he looked down embarrassed and mumbled, ‘’I could really use someone to talk to today. . . Please. We’ll get some food-just. . .’’ His hand retracted back into his lap as it looked like tears were beginning to brim his eyes.

Kyle couldn’t help it, he reached his own good hand back out and softly touched Eric’s chin, bringing his hand gently upto his cheek and wiping away at his eye, ‘’Don’t cry beautiful. I’ll listen and stay.’’ Seeing Eric so vulnerable always was Kyle’s weakness. Even when he believed him to still be a psychopath, the redhead couldn’t help but watch him closely, keeping an eye out for those bullies and waiting to see if he’d need to step in and help him. It was weird, but he’s always had some kind of soft spot for the brunette. 

The other teen sighed and wiped unconsciously at his other eye when Kyle took his hand away from his cheek. 

The waiter walked over, ‘’I see the other guest has arrived finally. . . What can I start you out with?’’ 

Thirty minutes had passed and there they sat, food half eaten and drinks full of melting ice. When all was said and done Kyle really couldn’t remember the last time he had this much fun with anyone just sitting and talking. He rested his hand under his chin and studied Eric’s face, tapping his own in thought. He didn’t want to ask so suddenly but he felt like he was going to get nowhere with him if he didn’t try to hold up his end with Stan and Kenny. After all, this whole thing was his idea.

He narrowed in his eyes at Eric and tilted his head, ‘’Do you mind me asking why you were on the verge of crying earlier?’’ He studied his face closely, looking for any sign of hesitation but the brunette just looked stoic, which was more concerning. ‘’If you don’t want to talk about it beautiful, we don’t have to-‘’ ‘’No that’s not it. . . It’s just that. . .’’ Eric shifted his eyes to his lap and then back up into Kyle’s green, ‘’There’s so much to go over. . . And I wouldn’t want to put my problems on you.’’ He laughed weakly, ‘’ I hardly know you. Y’know?’’ His hands came up to cover his face and he bit at his bottom lip, ‘’It’s bad enough I’m kind of using you as a replacement for someone else, then to give you my issues on top of that? What kind of an asshole would I be?’’

Kyle’s eyes softened, Eric was shaking now, body riddled with sobs as he turned his head down once more and cried. This wasn’t what he was expecting when he asked that question. Anger? Yes. Upset? Sure. But crying? Sadness? Heartache? No. No. No. His mind still wasn’t used to this Eric Cartman. Seeing him this vulnerable stirred emotions in him he’d desperately been trying to keep at bay. ‘’I wouldn’t mind, really. . . Everyone needs someone. . .’’ He once again had his hand reached out and laid atop the brunette’s. Part of him wondered briefly about who Eric was talking about, anger brewing in his gut, but he brushed it aside. It wasn’t any of his business who he liked anyways. 

Eric hiccuped and felt his fingers intertwine with the other’s. Tears slowly stopping as he felt himself calming down with the warmth and caressing of gentle fingers across his knuckles. He licked his lips slowly, feeling how dry and cracked they were before he spoke, slow and hoarse ‘’There’s these guys at my school. . .’’ Unintentionally he tightened his grasp on the hand in his and exhaled shakily, ‘’One guy specifically. . . He-‘’ green eyes gazed softly into hazel and Eric felt himself tense, ‘’Tell me beautiful, what does he do?’’ The brunette shifts in his seat a little and pulls his hand away from the man across the table and holds it to his chest as tears well up in his eyes again, ‘’He molests me. . . ‘’ He bares his teeth, grinding them slightly as the tears fall down his cheeks, ‘’He plays with me and forces me to suck him off and kiss him and-‘’ he’s almost hysterically sobbing now as he rasps out angrily, ‘’He’s tried to rape me!’’ Eric’s eyes go wide and he desperately tries to scramble to take back everything he’s just admitted, but all that comes out are more stifled sobs and hiccups. Covering his face with both of his hands he cries harder than before if at all possible and thinks about how terrible of a person he is, using this man any way he pleases. He’s so fucking selfish. He can’t bare to face him. 

Kyle’s chest is tight, he feels as if he’s suddenly being drowned, he’s suffocating and all at once his blood is boiling under his skin. What did Eric say just now? He looks down at his lap, a low hum in his ears, he feels light and everything seems to be going in slow motion. His fists curl and he focuses his attention back on the figure across from him. When did he start to care so much about him? Why was he even here again? His vision is blurry and he touches his cheeks as he wipes away his own tears. God fucking damnit. Damn Eric. Damn those assholes. Damn this whole horrible situation he dug himself into. Eric is sitting there, trembling and sobbing and all he wants is to see him happy.

Eric’s lips are on his, they’re kissing and he can’t remember when it started. He looks around briefly, trying to figure out how it ended like this again. They’re in the alleyway from the other night once more and the brunette’s body is flush against his. His eyes are closed and Kyle observes the tear stains on his cheeks. He brings up his good hand to caress them and deepens the kiss, feeling the other melt so easily into his embrace. He thinks about how the boy beneath him was just a sobbing mess not too long ago, and now, his arms are wrapped around Kyle’s neck, kissing him like he’s been poisoned and the redhead’s lips are the antidote. It strikes him in that moment that he really doesn’t know anything about the new Eric Cartman. Since high school began, when did he ever really speak to Eric like he was a friend? Like he cared about what was really happening in his life? Long lashes flutter up and he’s staring into those hazel eyes once again. When did he start avoiding him? 

The sound of footsteps crunching into the snow nearby causes them both to break apart rather quickly and Eric finds himself flustered and flooded with embarrassment for the thirtieth time that day. There‘s so much he wants to say to this man, but nothing that he thinks of can cover how grateful he is to him. He stares into those green eyes, speechless and leans up on the tips of his feet bringing the other in for another quick kiss, and mumbles something softly against the side of his face, before he takes off running down the street back to his home. The wind is deathly thick and cold against his cheeks, cutting sharply against his skin but he doesn’t care. His lips are raw and his head is pounding from all the crying, his skin feels like it might tear off at any second from his body, but he’s happy. He feels so light, like a giant weight was taken off of him, and he can soar to any heights he wants to now. The relief of finally telling someone, anyone, even in a man dressed in a silly red cat costume about his piece of shit bullies is so freeing, he feels like everything will get better. Almost.

He does wonder briefly however, as he steps into his house, and notices the second pair of shoes at the door next to his mom’s, how long it will be before another weight pulls him down once more.


	5. Slut

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey man, get a grip. Stop spiraling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sooooooooooo sorry. That’s all. C:

The smell of cigarettes and pot linger in the living room as Eric’s shoes come off his feet. He stands there, brown eyes darting up the stairs and to the side, curious. His chest is tight and it takes a moment before he realizes he’s been holding in his breath, feeling even more faint from the hard running and the thick cold air outside, his head spins.

He stands at the entrance, breathless and in a haze, waiting.

The first sounds that emit from the house are upstairs, there’s a thumping sound coming from what can only be his mother’s bedroom as moans and groans fill in the space between each tap on the wall. He wishes he was deaf.

Brown eyes land on the shoes once more as a memory tries to catch up to his current state. But his head is pounding and he can’t quite keep his balance.

He has to grip the wall beside him as his body sways forward briefly, the exhaustion and weight of everything finally creeping in. His fingers grip at the texture, feeling for any sort of stability as his legs refuse to hold his weight; and suddenly he’s on the floor. Head hitting hard onto the door frame behind him as his upper body slams full force into it and slides down to the ground less than gracefully. He feels an overwhelming amount of nausea roll through his body as he begins to cry and salivate. A panicked voice calls his name, his vision is too obscured with tears and exhaustion to see who it is but he already knows. 

Eric’s world goes black as his mom rushes down the stairs.  
~~~  
Upon arriving home Kyle Broflovski sheds out of all his attire and walks to his room, silent, and in a daze. His head is reeling from everything that just happened within the last two hours, what Eric told him still playing in loops in his mind as he tries to come to terms with all this new information.

He sits down on his bed, the warmth of the fabric barely noticeable as he’s lost in a trance. There’s such a stillness in the air that he begins to hear a slight high pitched buzzing noise, one that only registers when it’s so unbelievably quiet it’s as if you imagine sounds just to fill in the silence. He gingerly let’s his body fall back and to the side, curling up into a ball as he grips onto his bedsheets and stares blankly at the patterns of the fabric.

Everything is still.

Then an audibly sharp gasp cuts through the emptiness as Kyle begins to sob. Every single thought he has is focused in on Eric Cartman. Everything he feels for him is muddled and mixed and pouring out of him in wails and endless tears. His body rocks as he inhales and exhales shakily with every cry.

By the time his eyes are red and puffy and he has no tears left to shed, it’s dinner time and he hears his mother call for him but he can’t bring himself to get up. He feels so heavy and exhausted, his head hurts and so does his wrist; throbbing in its makeshift brace. 

He shifts onto his other side and his eyes land on his phone which lights up with multiple messages. He flips the phone face down hesitantly but without remorse, he’s too tired to see what’s happening with his friends right now and his eyes begin to lull in the back of his head as his mother begins to open his door. By the time she’s ready to scold him about his food, he’s already sound asleep. 

Sheila sighs and smiles to herself as she grabs her son’s blanket and gently places it onto his frame. She bites her tongue on wanting to wake him for dinner and instead leans down and kisses his forehead whispering a gentle ‘’Goodnight.’’ to him, exiting the room afterwards.

Kyle tosses and turns in his sleep all throughout the night, haunted by images of a chubby faced boy with brown hair, chocolate eyes and an evil smirk. He’s having a nightmare and twisting in his bed as he pops his eyes wide open, sweat glistening all over his body, he’s reaching out on reflex to something but he can’t remember what. His eyes scan the room and he finds his phone in the dark and blurry haze. The screen illuminates and burns at his eyes as he squints and reads the time, five AM, he yawns tiredly before looking through all the notifications on his phone. There’s tons from his friends in the group chat, one from Eric’s mother and one from Eric in the app. He starts with his friends.

Stan: hey bro did you message him yet? 

Stan: it’s been a couple of hours, did you talk to him?? let us know

Kenny: dudes i think i just saw an ambulance come from Erics house

Kenny: ya thats def Erics mom in the back

Stan: oh shit, you think he’s ok?

Kenny: idk man i can try to follow in my car tho

Stan: oh man, he didn’t look good earlier today. it must be something serious

Stan: any updates? 

Kenny: ya just spoke with his mom she said he passed out after he got home. hit his head on the door or somethin like tht

Stan: oh shit that sounds serious. where the fuck is Kyle??? why isn’t he answering?

His eyes rapidly read over every text and he suddenly straightens up in his bed, his body even more hot than before if possible. Almost immediately he goes from their texts to Eric’s mother’s.

Cartman’s Mom: Hi there! Sorry to bother you Kyle, I tried to call your house phone but no one was picking up, I’m not really sure why. Anyways, Eric just got home after going out somewhere, I’m not sure where, but he fell when he got back and hit his head pretty hard. He seems to have passed out. I’m not sure what to do. If your mom could drive us to the hospital I would really appreciate it! Um if you could, have your mother call me back please. Thank you. 

Scrunching up his face in disbelief he read over the text again and again, glad she had called an ambulance but worried for how long it might’ve been before she had done so. He exited out of the screen and opened the app, a message from Eric sitting there fresh in his feed from about twenty minutes ago. He tapped it.

Eric C.: Hey, so I’m in the hospital, um, I’m only really telling you this because I don’t want you to worry if I don’t message you back for a couple days or see you. Uh, something happened and now I’m gonna be here for a little bit, but don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine. Anyways, thanks for letting me vent. I really appreciated it. And sorry.

There was a wave of pain that eased its way into the redhead’s chest. He felt so. . . Sad. Here he was, sleeping away the world and all his problems, when Eric was injured shortly after seeing him, and was now in the hospital. Words couldn’t describe how guilty he felt. He knew he was unwell when they were at school, and he knew he had just had a whole breakdown when they were out together, but everything just kind of fell into the back of his thoughts. Once again, he closed his phone and flipped the screen over, it was all too much. Everything was just suffocating and his body felt on fire. There wasn’t anymore room for any other issues or problems to be introduced, his emotions and his body were at capacity. Full.

Closing his eyes, he fell back asleep instantaneously. He’d reply to everything in the morning. He’d work through this turmoil when he woke up. And as much as it pained him to just rest; it’s what he needed the most. And so he did. 

The next time Kyle opened his eyes, it was close to noon, and he was incredibly thankful that it was the weekend and not a school day; lest he get into a whole heap of trouble for missing classes. Altho he briefly figured he could’ve stayed home regardless because of his wrist and the fact that he still felt rather ill. 

He grabbed for his phone and opened the group chat. Stan and Kenny had texted in there a couple more times asking about him, so he responded.

Kyle: Hey guys, sorry I didn’t respond last night. I’ve been pretty exhausted lately, I think I’m getting sick. Not sure. Did you guys find out anything else about Eric tho? 

Kenny: fuckin took u long enough. damn u knw we were starting to worry bout u too

Stan: Hey man it’s all good. Yeah hes doing okay now, his mom said he should be out in like two days or something. You’re not feeling good tho?

Kenny: aye man dont u go passin out on us too . One dude in the hospital is enough

Kyle chuckles to himself as he reads over their concerns. They make plans to meet at one of the gas stations closer to Stan’s house so they can get snacks and hangout.

He scrolls through his phone and contemplates replying to Eric, but decides not to for the time being as he sorts out his feelings on everything. He does however reply to Eric’s mom, apologizing and wishing him a quick recovery. 

He feels bad. Everything just doesn’t sit right with him. But he can’t take anymore at the moment. He’s too frazzled. 

When he puts on his shoes to take off, he runs into Ike who’s sitting on the couch watching some anime. He throws back his head excitingly when he sees Kyle, ‘’Hey, hey bro-‘’ His voice is uneven and excited.

Kyle, wild-eyed and still in a daze after haphazardly throwing on his clothes turns his head to stare at his brother, confused. ‘’Uh. Yes Ike?’’ 

‘’Hey, are you going to hang out with Stan and Kenny today?’’ His mouth is as pursed as it can get, being a Canadian of course. His eyes are staring daggers into Kyle, but it’s not very noticeable.

The redhead nods slowly and fumbled for words, but Ike stops him. 

‘’Good! I’ll have a Musketeers and a slushee, the blueberry kind, when you get back. Thanks.’’ He smiles at him and goes back to watching the TV. 

Kyle is confused and taken aback for a second before realizing that Ike is giving him a deal. He knows he’s going to be out late, so he’ll cover for him and in turn, he has to buy him snacks. Clever kid.  
~~~  
Eric’s fingers twiddle around his phone. He holds it anxiously waiting for any messages from Ruby, but there’s no response. The monitors by his bed beep rhythmically, and his breaths seem to line in place with them. His eyes dart up to the ceiling as his fingers slowly loosen their grip and fall onto the sheets. 

His mind for a second wanders to the day before. He really did ruin his whole relationship with that man. He closes his eyes before the tears well in them. He always fucks up. He fucks everything up.

He searches for something else to think about and he’s brought back to those shoes before he fell. 

The world spins even as his eyes are closed and he sees nothing. He’s dizzy.

There’s hot breath on his neck and a man’s grunt in his ear. The smell of booze and cigarettes and his mother’s perfume is in his nose and he feels like he’s choking on it. There’s a hand that grabs at his waist and he realizes he’s naked.  
No. That’s not right. Why are there teeth on his neck? He feels dirty. He feels defenseless. He feels small.

He’s so weak.

His lips tremble and fingers are shoved passed them. 

He coughs.

Eric’s eyes open quickly, there’s three nurses surrounding his bed and his mother is off to the side frantically trying to push past them unable to get in between.

One of the nurses stares at him and is asking him something but he can’t hear her. Shes fuzzy. Her voice is hazy. Everything is just a blur, and once again Eric’s head is lulled back down and he’s unconscious.


End file.
